Jan Faull, M.Ed.
Parents on the Sidelines

With spring in the air comes little league baseball. Whether your child joins a baseball, T-ball, softball, soccer or basketball team, the parent's positive support is critical to determining if a child will reach his team-play athletic potential or drop out. Before defining your role on the sidelines, consider the following sobering information:

First, excelling in any sport is predicted mostly by inherited attributes, innate talent and body type fit for the sport (tall for basketball, short for gymnastics). Therefore, no matter how appropriate parents behave on the sidelines, their influence only can go as far as their child's genetic make-up. Parents need to keep their expectations realistic, and help their children find the sport that suits their innate abilities and body type.

Second, it's a myth that starting an organized sport when young will provide a competitive edge for athletic excellence when older. While unstructured exercise is critical to children developing physically, involvement in team sports for the under 8-year-old set does not necessarily put children on the path to team-play excellence.

So before driving your child to his first practice and buying that uniform, take time to ask yourself, "Why am I doing this?" Is it because you want your child to have a scheduled physical activity with peers and get involved with families with similar interests and values? Or are you doing it because you see a future Varsity star, eventually signing a pro contract?

If it's the latter, consider altering your approach because many children burn out early because of unrealistic expectations from parents and because of the undo stress that organized team sports can play on a young child's mind and body.

When young children take the field, remember, they're little kids who may be confused because they haven't yet acquired the mental ability to understand sophisticated rules and strategy. Also, keep in mind they're clumsy and uncoordinated because their muscles are still in the process of developing.

How you approach this team play experience will influence your child's success or failure, and their willingness to continue or drop out. Watch your demeanor before, during and after the game. Your enthusiasm and interest probably pay the best dividends.

Ten sideline rules to follow:

· Make sure you're not attaching your love to winning the game or your child excelling on the field. Love your child just the same if he hits three home runs or strikes out.
· Never scream at your child from the sidelines. Doing so will only confuse him.
· Avoid any confrontation with the coach. If a problem erupts, call after the game when your emotions have settled down.
· Hesitate from imposing professional standards on little league sports. They're kids, not paid professionals.
· Support this activity which includes taking your child to practices, playing and practicing in the back yard and standing on the sidelines cheering your child on.
· Prepare yourself to be the parent of a bench warmer. How will you handle this?
· Notice what your child does best. Talk up that one caught ball, or that one walk to first base.
· Take your child for a physical. Realize some young bodies will not be ready to handle rigorous throwing and running.
· Monitor your emotions and understand that if you think you might be embarrassing your child you probably are so quiet yourself down.
· Appreciate the coaches who give their time to train, guide, hug, wipe tears and encourage children building their character on and off the field.

If you're inclined to enroll your child, make enjoying this time together your top priority. This means holding your well-meaning tongue when it comes to criticism, and when the game is over, zipping your competitive lip avoiding evaluating what your child should have done on the field.